Op.8 No.6

Was whizzing down the road on the way back when this song played. Well, I can't really remembered if I heard it during my younger days. But some time during last year while playing mahjong on one late night, I heard it and like it immediately. Finally managed to search the song, and every time it plays, gives me a sour sadness feel. Anyway the song itself is quite sad also. But, it's nice even after all these years.

Driving in the car with the wind moving through your hair
I reach for you now, but you're not there
It was the perfect time, the perfect place for us to be
The nights were so warm, move close to me
Was it nothing at all ?
No more hope of holding your body in the moonlight
Did I fall in love, for nothing ?
No more hope of touching you, feeling you by my side
Did I fall love, for nothing ?
The music that played, as the sun started to fade
Our dream vacation was in my mind
Just another day I thought I heard you call my name
I wake up, she's gone, there's no one to blame
Was it nothing at all ?
I tell you right away I want you back into my life
But if you don't find the way I'll dream of you tonight
Wake up, she's gone

It really makes me wonder was it nothing at all. Despite everything that went through, done, given, spared, learnt; certain things, a single word or phrase can end it. Let's ponder for a short while, what we've played and done in our role and daily life...........

Recommended song : Was It Nothing At All by Michael Damian

Op.8 No.5

Late nights listening to class 95 is very soothing. It plays mostly ballads, hits from the 80's, 90's, sentimental songs, new songs etc. No matter in what kind of environment, let it be me at the chalet, playing mahjong over the night, or alone in my room, the songs are so pleasant. Still remembered playing mahjong at her friend's place while listening to class 95, suprisingly it keeps me awake. Ah......ever since the story ended, all has turn into dust. Back in late 90s, I was with some poly mates at a chalet, there were a few of us. We were chatting by the sliding door with our fags and listening to class 95. A sentimental retro song played and it suit the ambience perfectly. Majority are soothing and heart warming. Overall, the songs are suitable and soothing where ever you are. My personal feel. Not advertising for the station. Anyway blogs are meant for personal thoughts and justification. My friend commented my entries are soulful. Basically what comes to my mind and feel, I just type it. Will think if they are really soulful. Getting tired........mind is empty, think will stop here............

Recommended song : Unforgettable by Nat King Cole

Op.8 No.4

The final decision has been made. In order to attain total individual independence, I will let the seal to root in deeper. Attitude. Fuck care. Lonesome. Quietness. Total shut off. After seeing all these for so many years, and during last year I acquired the power of understanding their thoughts, character, way of life etc......I'm totally worn out. Getting sick and tired of the routines. Still remember I predicted something on Jan 2004, and bingo ! It happened in Nov. Well, actually should say forecast, foresee. Why I made that prediction is because of my experience and intuition. They never really failed me. It's hard to be longing. Society has changed. Thinkings and lifestyle upgraded. Stronger. Bold. That's what they are now...........

After I wrote the above paragraph, I paused for a long time. Don't really know what to write. The radio was playing "Forever Love" by Gary Barlow. Base on what I see what's around me, and what I went through, does it really exist ? Yes, it does. But humans now are more sophisticated, more open.....it's hard for it to exist if the time is not ripe. I'll just wait and see what's revolving around me. Become the harbor, not the cruise. Destiny shall do the command..........let me rest my heart, my soul

Days of joy
Days of sadness, slowly pass me by
As I try to hold you, you were vanishing before me
You're just an illusion
When I'm awaken, my tears have dried in the sand of sleep
I'm a rose blooming in the desert

Recommended song : I'll Never Fall In Love Again by Elvis Costello and Burt Bacharach

Op.8 No.2

My mind is quite blank now. Not really sure of what to write today. Basically, I'm staring at my computer in total darkness. Listening to Alkan's 48 Esquisses now. Thoughts start to rumble in my head. I need some quietness, peace. Maybe just drift away and shut myself. After all, it's sealed. Intelligence will tell you what I'm talking about..........

Finally get to watch Charlie and the Chocolate Factory last week. The director's marvellous fantasies and outstanding creativity are truly brilliant. After so many years, my childhood story has come to the big screen. Burton and Depp makes a great combination. Even though I'm watching without someone dear, throughout the show I'm smiling all the way. It gives me the warmth of younger days. Darn....reminiscing again....I realise I can swallow lotsa things alone now. Think will stop here. Anyway, to those who read my blog, please leave your nick or name if you gonna leave comments. Recently there are some spammers leaving their advertisement on the comments column...what the fuck.....sigh.......

Recommended song : Kurenai by X

Op.8 No.3

After much brianstorming, I finally think of how should I label my entries. The Opus numbers will be in the sequence of PHI. Depending how many entries I want the Opus to have, they will be in normal sequence, but at times will shuffle around. There were structures for blogging during the past few days. But due to network problem, and my intuition for writing was diminishing gradually, I abandoned the thought. I'm in the flash back of my childhood days again when I played my emulator. Managed to download some "new" old games for my emulator and when I saw the game "Aero Blasters" in front of my eyes, I was so astonished and happy laughing out loud. This particular game I played when I was still in primary school !!! Images of me in my grandma's house sitting down with my game set and controllers, my eyes were like glued to the television focusing on the game; appeared in my head. Though it feels nostalgic, but it's nice. I grew up there. The layout, funitures and bits and pieces of everything I can still remember, but vaguely. Sometimes, when certain things are no longer around, let it be tucked away at some place or gone, images of them still lives in one's heart. While writing this particular portion, I'm listening to Dvorak's Largo from Symphony No.9 , my heart feels sour, abit of sorrow inside. I miss her, and the place I grew up.

The Largo was so so beautiful. It sound like a lullaby, and yet it's in a wistful and nostalgic mood. Seems like going back to the place where you once been, for a long time. Late nights with this kind of music is sure luring memories.....

Recommended song : Take My Breath Away by Berlin

Op.8 No.1

Sometimes I wondered why life is so......so unpredictable. We can't seems to forecast what's in front of us, accurately. Was thinking, the people I met in my life, contributed certain memories of mine. Life is contradicting at times. Once I met the wrong one at the right time. I was being let down. And when I'm my wildest peak, I met the right one at the wrong time. I let her down. Recently there's a new song being played on the stations. I like the starting guitar solo part. The whole song has a melancholic kind of feel, sort of describing my thoughts.

My life is brilliant, my love is pure
I saw an angel of that I'm sure
She smiled at me on the subway, she was with another man
But I won't lose no sleep on that, 'cause I've got a plan
You're beautiful, you're beautiful
You're beautiful, it's true
I saw your face, in the crowded place
And I don't know what to do, 'cause I'll never be with you
Yeah she caught my eye, as we walked on by
She could see from my face that I was, fucking high
And I don't think that I'll see her again
But we shared a moment that will last till the end
You're beautiful, you're beautiful
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face
When she thought up that I should be with you
But it's time to face the truth, I will never be with you

It's hard to find someone that is classically inclined, listens to similar genre of modern music and interests. It's even worse that can't cross beyond the borders............that's life.........

Recommended song : You're Beautiful by James Blunt

Op.5 No.2

Hmmmm.......it's been sometime since updating my blog. Time flies.....it's mid August. National Day is over. The one and only public holiday. Oh mine......when's the next ? Seems I'm back dating my entries. Watched a ghost movie during National Day's eve, since it's the seventh month. Quite a good ghastly movie for a local production. It consist of local culture, and the taboos of the seventh month. Interesting I would say. Spent my holiday stoning and rotting at home. Practised Chopin's etudes...but my butt won't keep still. Sigh. Missed the fireworks. Anyway, I don't have any companion to watch with. Therefore stone at home facing my computer. Everybody loves fireworks. It's beautiful and enchanting. The best companion to watch with, I would say, will be your partner. I experienced twice. Back in 2000 was standing among the crowd when the fireworks for National Day brightened the dark sky. Sparkling color patterns were formed. Lovely. Second experience was 2004's new year's eve. Was in Ritz Carlton with my past and friends, while waiting for the lift to go down and take a look at the party, one glance out of the window, we saw fireworks shooting up from the "No Man's Land" opposite Esplanade. A real fantastic view. It was like a rocket of shooting star, eject up from the ground, and with a loud boom, it burst into flowery patterns of sparkling shining colors and illuminates the sky. It ended with glittering sparks falling down. Gives me a cosmic rain kind of feel. Simply beautiful. Perhaps the next fireworks I will go and take some pictures regardless I have a companion or not. I'm becoming like an independent lone stoner. Still haven't tried watching a movie alone. Maybe one of these days will do it.....

The reason why I recommend a song in each entry I wrote was to denote the feeling of my thoughts while writing. Songs are an expressive kind of composition. It replaced the classical solo music for letting modern people like us to understand music easier, and better.......

Recommended song : Endless Rain by X

Op.5 No.1

A nice quote from Franz Liszt's Harmonies poétiques et religieuses, for solo piano. For the meditative souls, "Who are elevated ineluctably by solitude and contemplation toward infinite ideas, that is, toward religion; all their thoughts are converted into rapture and into prayer, all their existence is a mute hymn to the Divinity and to hope." I think of all compositions by Liszt, this particular piece of music, I really cannot understand quickly. It's a very very in depth work. It consists Liszt's thoughts for religion, with its extraordinary chromatic and augmented harmonies, rhythmic complexities and irregular metre, all these cannot be understood within a short time frame. A distinctive matured composition. I think I should digest them slowly and hopefully be inspired to compose my thoughts in life, character, and meditate spiritually.

Recommended song : My Way by Frank Sinatra